We have gained a number of insights from this study and some smaller “side studies” that we did in connection with it. We will detail these lessons in the following section. First, we discuss lessons that led us to refine the model, then, lessons that extend the model in new directions.
3.1 Optimizing the MORE Life Experience Model
Single events vs. life phases. Sometimes, participants had difficulty pinpointing one specific event that led to an important insight or a change in worldview. They might have been struggling with a problem for a long time and then at some point, a relatively minor experience, such as a conversation they had or a book that they read, gave them a whole new perspective on the issue. In addition, even when people felt that a single difficult event had led to a major insight, it was often only in the aftermath of the event, when they had the time and nerves to reflect upon what had happened, that they realized how much they had changed. Thus, we would like to shift the focus away from life-changing events to life-changing
insights – which often but not always happen in the course of life-changing events. In future studies, we plan to ask participants more directly about the experiences that had the strongest effect on their views about life (see, e.g., Weststrate, Ferrari, Fournier, & McLean,
2018) instead of asking them about difficult events and lessons they derived from them.
Renaming some resources. First, while the acronym “MORE” was well suited to convey the general idea that wisdom should be related to “more life experience” as well as to M, O, R, and E/E plus life experience, we may not have chosen the optimal labels for all resources. We would like to change the labels of the “M” and “E” resources as follows.
Managing uncertainty and uncontrollability. The original label for the “M” resource, “sense of mastery,” is too closely related to concepts like self-efficacy and internal control beliefs. It captures the trust that wise individuals have in their own ability to master whatever may happen in their life, but it may not convey their above-average awareness of the unpredictability and uncontrollability of human life. We consider both sides to be equally important: wise individuals neither overestimate nor underestimate their control and knowledge about the world. As mentioned earlier, the psychological literature suggests that most people overestimate the control they have over their life and that these control illusions are actually beneficial to their well-being (Peterson & Bossio,
2001; Taylor & Brown,
1988). On the other hand, underestimating one’s control has been related to learned helplessness and associated with depression (Seligman,
1975); thus, there may also be people for whom wisdom comes from realizing that they actually do have control over important parts of their lives. However, as the majority of people tends to overestimate their control and other conceptions of wisdom have also included awareness of uncertainty as a criterion (Baltes & Staudinger,
2000; Grossmann,
2017), we prefer to emphasize in the new “M” that wise individuals are fully aware of the limitations of their control and knowledge, but able to manage this awareness well.
Emotional sensitivity and regulation. The original labels for the “E”, emotion regulation and empathy, were somewhat imprecise. Emotion regulation is often used for all phases of perceiving and managing one’s own feelings (e.g., Gross & Thompson,
2007). Empathy is usually distinguished from sympathy in that it refers to being aware of others’ emotions without necessarily sharing them. Our conception of the “E” resource is meant to convey that wisdom involves both an attentiveness and sensitivity to the feelings of oneself and others and the ability to regulate them, so as to remain (relatively) calm and to calm down others in challenging situations. Thus, the distinction between the two aspects of the “E” resource is no longer between the self and others but between (a) sensitivity to emotions, which involves being attentive to one’s own and others’ feelings and taking them seriously even if they are unwanted, and (b) regulation of one’s own and others’ emotions as a context requires, which includes the ability to maintain one’s calm even in emotionally challenging situations. As discussed later, sensitivity may actually be an early predecessor of wisdom like openness or empathy, whereas emotion regulation is more of an acquired competence that is learned with experience over the lifespan.
Differentiating reflectivity. One important step forward in our work has been specifying more precisely what kind of reflection about experiences can foster wisdom. Virtually every theory of wisdom involves some aspect of reflection or reflectivity, and virtually all authors agree that it is not having had certain experiences per se, but having reflected upon them that leads to wisdom (e.g., Ardelt,
2005; Glück & Bluck,
2013; Staudinger,
2001; Webster,
2007). However, what authors mean by reflection varies considerably. For example, Webster (
2007) defined his subcomponent of reminiscence and reflectiveness as “seeking to understand and derive insight from both our mistakes and successes“ (p. 168) whereas Ardelt (
2003) defined her reflective dimension as “looking at phenomena and events from many different perspectives to develop self-awareness and self-insight, [a practice that] will gradually reduce one’s self-centeredness, subjectivity, and projections, and increase one’s insight into the true nature of things, including the motivations of one’s own and other people’s behavior” (p. 278). These two conceptions touch upon somewhat different aspects of reflection; in fact, we found a low but significant
negative correlation between them (Glück et al.,
2013).
How do we understand reflectivity (originally called “reflective attitude”) in the MORE Life Experience Model? In a way, our conception combines Ardelt’s and Webster’s ideas: we believe that thinking back upon experiences is necessary but not sufficient for developing wisdom;
how one thinks about them matters as well. In line with Ardelt’s characterization, wise individuals reflect upon experiences with the aim of gaining insights and learning more about themselves and life in general. Weststrate and Glück (
2017) distinguished two forms of reflection in the interview transcripts from the study described earlier.
Exploratory processing is an analytical and interpretive way of reflecting about life events that emphasizes meaning-making (i.e., extracting lessons and insights), complexity, and growth from the past. For example, a participant in our study who had a son born with severe mental disabilities said, “I learned trust and acceptance. I am still learning. I am learning the whole time. I very often say that my oldest son is my greatest teacher. […] I just realize that accompanying my son’s life, I am in a constant learning process… I think this has given me strength.”
Redemptive processing, on the other hand, describes the tendency to transform an initially negative experience into an emotionally positive one, leading to sense of emotional closure and event resolution. A participant who had survived cancer said, “I have a very positive attitude. I thank my organs every day for working well. […] in retrospect, I am glad that I had cancer. […] Feelings of gratitude… I do not think about the cancer itself anymore. That is done. It is in the past. It doesn’t make sense to give in to the fear that it could come back.” (Weststrate & Glück,
2017, p. 807)
Studies have shown that exploratory processing of negative experiences is related to psychological maturity, while redemptive processing is related to happiness and well-being (e.g., King, Scollon, Ramsey, & Williams,
2000; Lilgendahl & McAdams,
2011; Pals,
2006). In our data, exploratory processing was correlated with wisdom, whereas redemptive processing was associated with well-being (Weststrate & Glück,
2017). Thus, wisdom-fostering reflectivity is exploratory in focus, aimed at learning about life in its complexity, and not redemptive, aimed at achieving closure and feeling better.
Manifestational vs. developmental resources and their different developmental timelines. In our original model, we assumed that the same resources foster the manifestation of wisdom during life challenges and the development of wisdom from life experiences: a person higher in the MORE resources would deal with a difficult situation in a wiser way and would also be more likely to grow even wiser from that experience. We still believe in the first assumption: a person dealing wisely with a difficult situation will be able to manage uncertainty and uncontrollability, open to alternative views, reflective of his or her views and behaviors, and sensitive to his or her own emotions and those of others involved and able to regulate them as the situation requires. The idea that these same resources also foster the development of wisdom, however, needs some differentiation. Both theoretical considerations and the dissociation we found for the self-report measures suggest that the resources have different developmental trajectories and different ways of interacting with wisdom in the course of development. Some of the resources – especially openness and emotional sensitivity – may be relatively early predecessors of wisdom, already present to individually different degrees in children. Reflectivity is probably learned from experience, starting early on – parents and caregivers can be models of critical self-reflection (or of defensiveness and denial). On the other hand, learning to manage uncertainty and uncontrollability probably requires relevant life experiences. It is therefore most likely to develop as people move from the growth-oriented, self-confident, expansive mindset of adolescence and young adulthood towards a more balanced view of their own power and its limitations in middle adulthood, by which point most individuals have experienced many life challenges. Similarly, while most people learn the “basics” of emotion regulation in childhood, extraordinary levels of this resource may develop in the course of adulthood as people are faced with more difficult emotional challenges such as divorce or serious illness. There are certainly individual differences in the developmental trajectories of all the resources depending on people’s individual experiences. But generally, people at different ages are likely to show somewhat different constellations of the MORE resources.
Importantly, we also believe that the resources interact dynamically with one another. Ideally, they foster each other’s development over time (Glück & Bluck,
2013). For example, if a child who is highly empathetic and emotionally perceptive also has the cognitive resources and environmental modelling and support necessary to acquire reflectivity, he or she is likely to develop effective emotion-regulation skills and an awareness of the limitations of his or her control. These skills, in turn, may enable him or her to become an extraordinary source of support and advice for people in need without burning out emotionally in the process.
Optimal vs. maximal levels of the resources. We have also found that for all five MORE resources, the optimal level may not be the maximum possible. It is possible to be so aware of uncertainty and uncontrollability that one becomes helpless, so open to others’ views that one cannot hold one’s own positions, so self-critical that one loses any self-confidence, so sensitive to others’ feelings and concerned about acquiescing them that one sacrifices one’s own well-being. Thus, while for most people becoming wiser means gaining a bit more distance from themselves and learning to take others’ perspectives, for others it may mean building trust in their own feelings, standing by their own values, and taking care of their own needs as well as those of others. Wisdom is a matter of balance more than extremes, and it manifests itself in the way individuals deal with specific, contextualized problems where optimal solutions may not always be possible (Sternberg,
1998).
3.2 Extending the MORE Life Experience Model
Other potential resources. One question that we have repeatedly discussed is whether the original five MORE resources are really the most important possible ones. Even if, as we showed earlier, the relationships between them differ somewhat by method of assessment, they are related both empirically and conceptually. In fact, we believe that in their dynamic developmental interaction they form a kind of “self-reinforcing syndrome”. For example, openness and empathy are likely to reinforce a self-reflective attitude, and such an attitude is likely to foster the development of emotion regulation skills, which may again help people remain open to others’ perspectives. It is an interesting question whether this “wisdom syndrome,” which we imagine as a kind of general mindset, includes other attitudes and capacities as well, some of which may even be more specific to wisdom than the ones we have described.
In her master’s thesis, our project member Lara Dorner drew upon the literature on growth in psychological and psychotherapeutic contexts to identify other growth-fostering resources that would also seem relevant to wisdom (Christopher,
2004; Curnow,
1999; Deci & Ryan,
2008; Joseph & Linley,
2005; Jung,
1971; Kramer,
1990; Labouvie-Vief,
1990; Levenson,
2009; Linley,
2003; Pascual-Leone,
1990; Rathunde,
2010; Rogers,
1964; Tedeschi & Calhoun,
2004). She identified six resources that came up across various conceptions of growth (Dorner,
2012). The arguably most important ones are process orientation and self-integration.
Process orientation is a view of life as continuous learning and growth. Process-oriented individuals know that change is inherent in life and that negative experiences are unavoidable; rather than avoiding these challenges and contradictions, they are open to them and embrace the insights they bring with them
Self-integration is perceptiveness to and acceptance of one’s own emotions, intuitions, and physical sensations. Self-integrative individuals do not suppress or ignore these perceptions, but are attentive to and accepting of them, even if they run against their ideal of how they would like to be. They aim at integrating even complex and contradictory facets into their own self-concept, which leads to a continually more complex view of the self.
Acceptance and trust is a general attitude toward life that is able to look at things and let them happen, trusting that things will be okay, or if they are not, one will be able to deal with them, instead of constantly needing to take action and control.
Self-determination is a way of living one’s life that takes one’s own individual needs and personality into account, follows one’s intrinsic motivations, and does not care about external evaluations or reinforcements. Self-determined individuals take responsibility for their actions as they act in accordance with their own self, and value the autonomy and authenticity of others as well.
Self-transcendence is a way of experiencing the world that is not centered on one’s own self. Self-transcendent individuals do not feel the need to evaluate others, do not feel threatened when others disagree with them or prove them wrong, and do not depend on the admiration of others. They are compassionate and unselfish as they feel deeply connected to others and the world at large.
These six resources have been shown to be characteristic of growth processes that happen as individuals grow from difficult experiences both inside and outside psychotherapeutic contexts. They have some obvious conceptual relations to the MORE resources (for example, self-integration is related to emotional sensitivity, and process orientation to managing uncertainty), and we find indications of them in our interview transcripts. Thus, they are likely to be facets of the “wisdom-resource syndrome” as well. We selected the original five MORE resources because they were relatively close to established psychological concepts, which made it easier to conceptualize and measure them. It is an open question for future conceptual and empirical work whether additional resources might be added to the model.
Situational variability of wisdom. One of our most important insights concerns the question whether wisdom is a stable personal trait or a more fluctuating phenomenon. The idea that people’s wisdom varies across situational contexts has been supported by experimental research (overview in Grossmann,
2017) as well as by studies showing that most people can recall situations in which they did something wise (Bluck & Glück,
2004; Glück et al.,
2005). Our research suggests, however, that there is variation not just in how wisely people act across different situations, but also in how wisely they reflect upon past experiences. As described earlier, participants in our study were interviewed about two different experiences: a conflict and a difficult event. We did not only have raters who evaluated the interview transcripts for the MORE resources, but also raters for wisdom, as we thought that it might be possible to measure wisdom by interviewing participants about life challenges. Trained student raters evaluated each transcript concerning the components of three different wisdom models: the Three-Dimensional Wisdom Model (Ardelt,
2003), the Berlin wisdom paradigm (Baltes & Staudinger,
2000), and the Bremen wisdom paradigm (Mickler & Staudinger,
2008). A fourth group of so-called “lay raters” rated the transcripts for wisdom using their own understanding of wisdom. Interestingly, the correlations within each interview suggested that the different wisdom conceptions tap rather similar characteristics: the average correlation was .73 within the conflict interview and .69 within the difficult-event interview. However, the correlations across the interviews suggest much less commonality with an average of .31 (Glück,
2018). Thus, a participant might well have talked very wisely about a conflict from her past but much less wisely about the other difficult event and vice versa.
Much recent research has shown that wisdom varies by situations – the same person may act very wisely in one situation and much less wisely in another. In other words, wisdom is not only determined by a person’s stable personality, but also by situational context (Grossmann,
2017). Our findings suggest that wisdom varies even when the external context of life reflection is held constant: people who are talking about two different situations in the same interview room, with the same interviewer, may still be far wiser about one situation than about the other. Thus, how wisely we are able to think about a past experience varies as well. Different experiences have different meanings for us, they happened in different life phases and taught us different lessons. How wisely we think about them may also depend on how much we have thought about the event before, who we talked to about it, what kind of responses got from others as we talked about it. The stories we make of our past experiences are often constructed in close contact with others; thus, others may have a strong influence on how much wisdom we can gain from an experience. This insight, together with some others, has led us to think more generally about the role of interpersonal resources for wisdom.
The important role of interpersonal resources. We began to notice the importance of external resources early on in our study. In particular, Susanne König, a doctoral student and interviewer in the research project, noticed that wisdom nominees seemed to be talking about gratitude far more often than other participants did. Eventually she wrote her dissertation on the relationship between wisdom and gratitude, demonstrating that, indeed, wisdom nominees far more often mentioned spontaneously that they were grateful for something or someone (König & Glück,
2014). Asking the participants what they were most grateful for, she found four categories that were mentioned more often by wisdom nominees: life in general with all its ups and downs, their health, their faith, and their partners. Given that most of them were middle-aged and older adults who had been in their relationships for a long time, one would not necessarily expect them to still feel gratitude for having their partner. One participant described her relationship as the best “event” in her life: “… he feels it when I’m not feeling good, and I can talk to him about it, and yes, I am very grateful that I have such a wonderful relationship. I am happy and grateful that I have him.”
Beyond intimate relationships, we also saw the importance of other people for wise individuals in an ethnographic study that another project member, Katja Naschenweng, carried out (for other ethnographic work on wisdom see Edmondson,
2005,
2013). She wanted to study the small tribe of wise individuals just as one would an indigenous people in a distant corner of the world: by observing how they live their lives. She did so with five particularly wise participants of our study. Among several interesting commonalities she found between those quite different people, one was that while they lived somewhat contemplative lives in quiet places, they had not at all turned away from the outside world: they used media actively and selectively, they were very interested in art, literature, and philosophy, and they valued their active social lives. They considered their partners, family, and friends as important sources of not just happiness, but also insight. One participant said, “You need people with whom you can discuss issues, not just the usual blah-blah. We talk about things that are really important to us. I grow through my friendships and relationships. Sometimes I really want to be challenged in those conversations” (see also Weststrate & Glück,
2017).
In sum, these findings drew our attention to the importance of external, especially interpersonal resources for wisdom. How much and with whom we talk about our experiences and what we make of them may be as important as our internal ways of reflecting upon them. There may be different ways of telling stories that parallel the different forms of reflection that we have identified. Sometimes we talk about an experience for redemption: we know exactly what we want the listener to say to make us feel better, and we choose our audience and tell the story so as to elicit that reaction. At other times, we want to explore, to get to see a viewpoint, to perhaps gain a new understanding. This form of storytelling is clearly more likely to lead to new insights. Perhaps wise people are less reluctant to explore their own experiences by talking about them in this exploratory way than most of us are. This idea may suggest a Vygotskyan perspective (e.g., Kozulin,
2014) on the development of wisdom.
2 Perhaps there is a “zone of proximal development” for wisdom in the sense that people’s previous life experiences and internal resources determine the extent to which they can grow towards wisdom if they get the right external feedback. A mentor, psychotherapist, or simply a wise friend may be able to open up new perspectives on an experience or situation that may not only help them to resolve a problem but also to grow wiser (Igarashi, Levenson, & Aldwin,
2018).